Friday, March 19, 2010

How would you like yourself to .....

I was talking with my friends yesterday while hang out and chilling around. There's one topic that come up. It is a common question but some of us would rather skip it. Afraid maybe? But sooner or later.. I know it will happen.

We were talking about, How Do You Want To Die?

One of my friend said she want to die in a sleep or maybe in a car accident. I told her i want to die on an old age or if not..... well. I prefer that. As long as it is quick and painless. By the time i said that, there is another person approaching us and asked:

"Why would you like to live so long? So Old? Your going to be all brittle. "

The conversation becoming with more and more people with more opinion. Some totally agreed with me, dying due of old ages and some not. They said theyprefer to live until 60 or maybe 50.

And I was like.. WHAT? WHY? Ok. I know we cant choose how or when we gonna die right? But this is just a conversation that we're having and shockingly getting a very good response from everybody. The things that shocking me the most is why are people afraid of becoming old? Is it because they become more inactive? Unable to do their favourite pastimes? Or maybe there's alot of things happen today that includes young people and elder hood. As you can see from the news, kids are dumping their parents at old folks or or worst just by the side of the road. Maybe that's why people afraid of becoming old?
But for me, if they trained their children so well, kind and noble. With knowledge in their heart and soul and religions and faith, none of these things would happen, right? Maybe the person who scares of getting old were doing the same thing to their parents. That's why they afraid that their children might do the very same thing to them.

And I dont ever dream that i would terminate one's life before becoming a senior or not, by accident or not. I think the most beautiful part of life is childhood and elderhood. Both are so innocent and so fragile.

I think the question come from the fear knowing that you are soon to die. But you never really know how, why and when. I've been witnessed to both sudden and bedridden death. To someone who really is dear to me, my grandmother, friends, cousin' s wife and someone who i miss so much that i suddenly getting the urge to make this entry, my past other half. Hope he and all of them are Rest In Peace.
And I realize how regretfull it is to be unaware of your own passing. Regretfull to the love one who still lives among u s and to the one who is no longer present.

This exact same subject been going through my head lately. We think that we are young. Then we turn to the age that we dont want to see.

Dont Live Like a Dead Person Without a Soul - once he said

Then there is one of my friend said the bes t way to die is in a luxury that he'll realistically probably never have. Either that, or he want to die in his fifties. He dont want to grow old. He hate being a child and he cant imagine enjoing being old.

I cant imagine how he live his childhood time. well, maybe he has his own story. we never know.

And like i said, dying due to old ages. One of good things about an illness is it will push me to fight for my life. Bringing familie s and friends together. Its about finally cherishing what i've taken for granted before. I hope I wont gi ve in to death so easily .

LIFE is the only very very very best thing I've ever had. I dont even know why some people would give it up. I just cant imagine how many 'Thank You', 'Sorry' and 'I Love you' that i would desperately love to say by that time.

I should start saying them at every opportunity. And maybe even now. let people know how much they mean for me before its too late.

Dying of old ages so that i would be able to go through childhood, learn all that life has to offer me, and then sit back and rest. I want to share my experience s with the younger generations, share some advice and tell them that in the end, all struggles are worth it. Whether or not i still have a memory, whether or not I could still walk or eat by myself.

I think... at that stage of life , death comes at the right moment and it comes very peacefully. When im on my bed, all wrinkled and frail, surrounding by friends and family (I hope), I will think to myself .. .

"It's time for me to go... I'm ready..."

2 comments:

  1. Kamek pun prefer to die on an old age. Ermm even kita siktauk camne kita mati lak ba. Things happen for a reason ba hoh..

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  2. hmmm... dying old i prefer... i wanted 2b there when my love one GONE... i rather live like that than imagining how sad love one can be seing me GO 1st... i want to live seeing every1 i love living happily... hmmm... its only a hope rite... MATI itu PASTI... ya JANJI ALLAH pd kita...

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